Arooj Arshad
3 min readSep 15, 2024

Signs that you are in an abusive relationship

It’s really easy to say someone or a relationship is abusive when it's physical. It’s not so easy to identify abuse when physical touch isn't involved requiring an awareness of non-physical forms of abuse.
non-physical abuse encompasses behaviours that aim to control manipulate or demean a partner without relying on physical Force such as emotional manipulation , psychological coercion and verbal insults is your relationship keeping you up at night or leaving you with a heavy heart all day so you can stop second guessing yourself and get some answers.

Here are some signs your relationship is actually abusive

Love bombing:
Too much of a good thing are you confused about how you got here since your relationship started off so well so I dated someone once let's call them Aaron. Aaron could have fallen out of an episode of Bridgeton he was that perfect good morning and good night texts , daily flowers sent to the office lavish gifts or a trip every weekend as I aligned a romcom in real life. It was a whirlwind romance and Alina was convinced they were soul mates. Aaron promised Alina they'd be together and Alina knew it was finally true love. almost overnight Aaron changed and made Alina feel indebted to him because of his kindness a s felt manipulated by Aaron .Aaron had now created this power Dynamic over Alina and Alina didn't know what to do does this sound too familiar if so you might have experienced love bombing therapist explains that love bombing is a manipulation tactic used by abusers to gain your trust and affection within a short amount of time while there's nothing wrong with frequent gestures of love .love bombing is immediately withdrawn with no reason this intense love and abrupt stop is a red flag that your relationship is abusive.

Gas lighting:

your partner make you feel like you're losing your mind not in a figurative sense but in a real way where you're having to second guess yourself all the time maybe your partner lies and twists the truth but never admits to doing so maybe they tell you you never asked them to take the garbage out when you did twice already if this sounds like your partner they may be gas lighting you. For instance if your partner hurts your feelings do they respond by saying but I would never hurt you instead of taking ownership and apologizing. gas lighting is a manipulation tactic and a type of emotional abuse that can take a serious toll on your mental health according to their research victims of gas lighting start to feel un sure about their perceptions of the world and even wonder if they're losing their sanity if your partner is engaging in gas lighting tactics there is a reason you feel insane and that reason is not you if they're gas lighting you it may be necessary to protect yourself from their harmful Behaviour this is abusive.

Narcissistic abuse:

Narcissistic abuse is particularly hard to notice as the toxic relationship and the abuser can present perfect in the beginning. if your partner has narcissistic personality disorder NPD or has narcissistic Tendencies they may have little empathy and see you as beneath them which can lead to abusive behaviours these abusive behaviours can look like withholding affection or money is a way to punish you trying to interfere or sabotage your career Hobbies or the other way relationships in your life taking your phone demanding to know your passwords or even making sarcastic comments to bully you out of hanging out with certain people.

Be aware of red flags and don’t become a victim of abusive relationship.

Arooj Arshad
Arooj Arshad

Written by Arooj Arshad

| NLP Associate Practioner By ABNLP | Life Coach |

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